This week, we at Maddtimes are creating awareness on Prostate Cancer, that disease that used to make person prick not stand again.
You see, for so many men, this particular ailment is major, cos we have heard of men who will still wank or nack even with leprosy or 3rd degree burns on their body.
But anything that has to do with the erection or its ability to drill is of major concern to us.
So they have said that once you are 50, the risk of the Prostate increases. Now I didnt conect with this wahala early. I was living my life and hitting it up with the strength of a mule
Till one day, I woke up with no erection . As a well known hypochondriac, I went into panic mode.
Aghhh I screamed. Jumped into the bathroom straight to the mirror and what I saw made me squim from shock.
It was limp and dead. Shriveled and didn’t look like it’s former self. It used to be bold and proud with a long vein that proclaimed it’s vitality.
Now it looked very wimpy and sloppy. It’s faced down with no hope of ever standing up. So I called my Dr. DR Nwabuoko don suffer for my hand. Every pimple, I don call the Havard trained Doctor to complain
Dr, my prick Don die. Edgaaaaaar, he shouted. You don start again. Wetin do am– he asked.
I screamed, he no stand again. He laughed. Edgar, he stand yday? I said yes. But he dey stand every morning so this one wey he no stand na major problem.
He said Edgar abeg go ahead with your daily chores nothing do u. When u ready come do your Prostate check and I am sure you will be OK.
Kai. I no fit do any test I dey fear O. Then I saw Area fada’s clip and his journey through surgery. I die. Fear paralysed me and the thing kuku just go on vacation.
Every morning I will see the thing looking like Tinubu. I will call Dr and he will say Edgar go work abeg nothing do u. I will shout ooo. Dr na three days O. He will laugh and drop.
I will now go to X Videos and go straight to kitten my favourite African American porn star. Nothing. I will out of exasperation drop the lap top and open bible to pray for miracle.
Then I heard on radio how Prostate was killing men. The statistics was dire and they said early detection was the best cure.
The doctor now said, that we must ejaculate at least 21 times a month to reduce the chances of this dreaded illness.
At this point, I started thanking God for soapy cos if we rely on women na death go carry all men go abi which woman go let you nack am for 21 times in a month.
One morning 2 week’s after, I saw it. It was hard and massive. Ohh my God, I screamed and called Dr Nwabuoko- it has come O ooo.
He hissed and said better con and do you test.
I said OK. I will come.
So with fear I walked into his office. Since they say 21 times ejaculations will help my case, I did soapy everyday for 10 days to increase my chances of escape by at k ast 50%
He councelled me and said, ‘ see Edgar if you record less than 4 u are perfect but above 4 we can handle you with medication even at 6 can be handled the most important thing is early detection.
I said Dr, at 6, will I still abl to get an erection and he said yes.
He told me about a patient who had caught it on time and was saved.
I said let’s do it. He took the blood sample which is a far cry from the one that they will be putting finger in your anus.
Gave me supplements that would aide blood flow and increase sensitivity and generally help me as a 50year old and sent me on my way.
In the evening he called. Edgar I have good and bad news, which do u wnat first
I say Doctor, my erection don go? He got irritated what is all these about.
I say what will it profit a man if he gains everything but looses his erection….
Edgar your Prostate is perfect. It’s less than 4 about 2 sef but your cholesterol is bad.
Either you go on drugs or you increase your walk outs and change lifestyle. Cut off red meat totally and no fried foods.
I thanked him and tapped my penis as I dropped the phone
Pls guys, go and get tested. If you catch it early it can be handled with medication and no surgery but if you allow it fester your balls will be fried and you may loose your life.
Stand up against Prostate Cancer guys.